I cease to exist >.> when I am sick

I hate getting sick. I hate germs. I hate stuffy noses. I hate sore throats. I hate coughing. I hate getting sick. I hate getting sick....I hate getting sick.

Why? Mutiple reasons.

1. I can't go to school! Now you probably think that this is the most terrible reason in the whole wide universe. But it's an awesome reason to hate getting sick. When you're sick you miss out on the socialness of life, the wonderfulness of being with people. Rachel, I hope you decide to read this today! I love you and miss you and want to be with oh so much <3 <3 <3 But I won't see you till Friday. And I miss you too Jon...even though I doubt you will see this. The thought that counts.

2. I annoy myself to death.

3. I spend my days glancing at the clock and thinking "Everybody's in Bible right now." or "Everybody's socializing and have lunch. without me." I sound very pathetic to myself and I do not like it.

4. I cease to exist. Both literally and figureitvely. For one I tend to loose weight and I'm already pretty skinny >.< so now when people give me hugs they're gonna say "whoa! Becca was right here! Where'd she go?" And I'll glare at them and say "I'm still in your arms silly." Another is that I ceases to exist in reality as well. People's days go by and once in a while they will think "Oh, that's right. Becca's not here. All well." :(

5. I tend to over dramatize things. Great example would be reason #4.

6. I get all confused and light headed and stare off into space a lot (more than I already do at time). It's really annoying.

7. I forget things easily. I was actually gonna be some snazzy reason for #7 but I totally forgot in the blink of an eye.

8. I'm sick.
"You're what?!"
Yea. I'm sick. Couldn't tell? Oh that's right. My voice sounds like a chainsaw. I'm sorry.

9. Refer back to reason #5.

10. I tend to overthink things (this is what I was gonna put for reason #7. I think.) I mean I already do that already, but it's infity x worse. Things I shouldn't even be worrying about yet suddenly pop into my mind. For example: "Where am I going to college? Who will I marry? Where am I gonna die?"

*sigh* And so I will be quiet now and go back into my little world of nothingness, my little world of being bad and feeling sorry for myself. >.< That's another reason. I feel sorry for myself when I shouldn't. Guess it just comes from getting all stuffy.

All prayer would be loved and dearly appreciated. I am sorry for being negative in this little post. Perhaps when I am all well I will put a positive post =) that's something to look forward too.

--Becca